A new world to fear
by Kinkostfur
Summary: What is to do a normal nerdy girl when confronted with the cruel world of Skyrim? Find love with a man than can protect her, of course! But how many trials is she going to face before?   Just because there aren't enought self-insert fics!
1. Chapter 1

**My first try ever on the fanfiction, so be soft on me. I'm just learning English, to boot, so I made lots of mistake for sure, and I'll do more. **

**I'll be thankful for any help you can give me.**

**And why this story even started to be written there? Because there's so little self-insert Skyrim fics, of course! The story will be less of a quoting as I'll got through the prologue, but it still be mainly my character's rambling inside her head. Oh, and a bit of romance later. With Vilkas. Nothing really steamy, though.**

**And the boring part: "Skyrim and The Elder Scrolls series belongs to Bethesda, that I love for this."**

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><p>The first sensations I felt waking up was a gentle rocking, and a cold wind on my exposed skin. I half-heartedly tried to cover myself up, but couldn't really move my hands.<p>

'Huh, I have to turn around to stop lying on them…' I thought. 'Wait, what!"

I wasn't lying on my hands. I had them bound tightly behind in front of me, and I wasn't lying either. I was sitting upright, the sounds that I dismissed as something on TV finally started making sense when I sleepily started to took in my surroundings: the shaky cart, horse, and the snowy landscape around me.

"Hey, you!" the harsh man's voice drawn my attention to the person sitting across the cart. "You're finally awake."

I must have frowned as I felt a scary foreboding dawning on me. The man – a blonde, quite handsome one - ignored me and just continued talking.

"You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked into that Imperial ambush, same as us and that thief over there."

Oh God, that cannot be true… It all sounded too familiar.

The second man has shattered all delusions that I could have had.

"Damn you, Stormcloaks. Skyrim was fine until you came along."

* * *

><p>Through the rest of the ride to the first town I was going to see in this frozen land, I'm sure that I turned green to yellow and white at last several times, thinking of what has just happened. I couldn't understand this, but the sight of well-known scenery alone was enough to assure me in my suspicion: I was in Skyrim, and in the game-starting situation, too. Since I didn't believe that anyone I know would make such a perfect cosplay of my fellow prisoners, this had to be a dream. I played Skyrim quite a lot lately, after all. Fervently, even. I could just wait and relax a little, while the wagon continued to rock.<p>

While ignoring scared chatter of the others, I took in the Ulfric's - the Jarl Ulfric's - appearance. Even with that gag in his mouth, he looked pretty much handsome. His defined nose, and hard gaze sure was attractive, and his hair somehow managed to look less unkept than other men's.

I was brought back from my contemplation by the rough soldier's voice.

"General Tulius, sir! The headsman is waiting!"

I was watching the town closely as we rode in. I always played the game on the lowest details possible, so it hadn't looked so impressive. If I could, I would pat my imagination on its back. The houses, the people on the streets... and the soldiers, it all looked one hundred percent real. I didn't even thoght that I had that in me.

When the carts stopped, I tried to hop off of it gracefully, but stumbled and fell on my knees instead. Wonderful, being clumsy even in my dreams surey gave me credit, didn't it? Speaking of which, even if I knew it wasn't real, I couldn't help starting to get a little frightened. It could be one of these nightmares where everything would go wrong, after all - the dragon not coming, or killing me, or somesuch. The horse thief try on running away didn't lighten my mood, too. Even if I was amazed how fast the man could run with his hands bound, the sound of a pierced flesh... well, it wasn't nice. Very much so.

The Imperial officer reading a prisoners list finally made it to the part where the character creation window should pop up. Just to say, it didn't.

"Who. Are you?" he asked.  
>I found it fitting to give him my game name.<p>

"My name is Eleima." I answered, looking calmly in his eyes.

"You picked a bad time to come home to Skyrim, kinsman." The man answered, looking pained.

I was quite suprised that I was classified as a Nord, since I was Slavian. But then again, I was quite pale, gray-eyed and blonde. All of these I'd passed on my game character, too, so probably there wasn't anything wrong with it.

The Stormcloack soldier lost his head as he always did. And it took me the sickening smell of the blood to understand why all of that felt wrong.

I can never smell anything when I'm dreaming.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for kind reviews. This chapter is a bit boring, to me at last, and not so much thinking, but I'll make up for this in the next one. They are short ones anyway, aren't they? And it doesn't look like they were going to get longer in the near future. Anyway, I'm gonna skip as much as possible in the next ones, but I will get the first dragon killed BEFORE I'm going to head to the Companions, so few more chapters in the way. I think I'm going to be able to update everyday for a week or so, so watch out for more stupidity! :D**

**Anyway, I've never thought that writing could be so much fun. Even if you'll find this chap terrible, I won't really mind. Just tell me what went wrong.**

**RainbowWhisper - self-insert stories are fun, 'cause they allow you to look on the world you see in game, film or book from the other perspective. And I'm happy that it made you laugh, even if it wasn't intended. I just tried to imagine what I, myself, would be thinking at that situation, and it come out, I'd be sarcastic at myself, and checking out guys, sadly. :D**

**xcaliber - yeah, I thought it would be horrible boring to read a thing everyone who played Skyrim knows by heart. That's why I don't like *this* chapter. But I'm still struggling to learn how tonot repeat the game in the fanfiction.**

**And the bad part, Skyrim belongs to Bethesda, not me. In the other case, the main quest would be plain, honest dragon-killing, not some sneaky business. I hate that stuff on *this* playthrough. My Dovahkiin is a Companion, after all.**

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><p>To say I was scared sensless would be a mild wording. I could barely hear the harsh voice of an Imperial Captain, calling me to the block. It took me a push from a soldier to move forward. Still paralysed with fear, I stumbled upon a Stormcloack slodier's body, it's dead weight making me want to throw up. It only get worse, when I was forced roughly on my knees, facing face-to-wound the severed head of the warrior. I had to force myself to hold back a sob, but I hadn't managed to stop trembling. I watched the bloodied axe of the executioner as it rose, knowig that I couldn't close my eyes even for a moment, if the dragon decided to show itself in time.<p>

And it bloody well did. I thanked every single god that could hear me at the moment in my thought as it's bat wings showed on the sky behind the man's back. The giant beast landed heavily, and it was all I needed to get on my hands, but I wasn't fast enough. It's roar knocked me back on the ground, making my vision blurry. I struggled to rise again, but failed miserably until somebody's strong hands caught me and helped me up.

"Get up! Gods won't give us another chance!" the Nord - Raloff, if I could remember correctly - cried in my ear, then ran away in the direction of the tower.

"This way!" He added, looking back at me.

I followed him as fast as my shaking legs allowed, stumbling now and then. Still dizzy from the dragon using it's Voice on me, I hasn't really comprehended what was happening around me, dead bodies lying around, screams of the wounded mindling with the tumble of the rocks and the roar of flames, the scent of blood and smoke filling my nostrils.

"Jarl Ulfric! What is that THING? Could the legends be true?" asked my savior, tearing me out from my daze.

"Legends don't burn down villages " came the jarl's calm answer, his deep voice soothing my panic.

The call from Raloff had me ready to run up the tower's steps. When the wall get blown up mid-way, I looked down in fear. I won't be able to manage this, that roof is too far, and there's fire down there...

"Jump!" the Nord screamed. And I jumped.  
>I barely managed to catch myself on the roof, nearly loosing my eye in the process. I rolled helplessy on the floor, but the survival instinct was stronger than my lack of strenght. I get up on my feet and jumped down again and forced myself to run, this time to face the Imperial officer.<p>

"Still alive, prisoner? Keep close to me if you want to stay that way!" exclaimed the man, somehow looking more alive than I before. He head out fast, forcing me to follow, nearly in front of the dragon, and all I could do was to keep my balance with my hands stil bound.

We rushed through the burning city, the dragon still causing destruction. I knew that when we get to the keep, this whole nightmare would end. Then I caught the sight of Raloff, and knew that all be well now.

Or, rather - I corrected myself - as well as it could be, considering current circumstances.


	3. Chapter 3

**Well, the last chap was so short because I had to write it twice, 1st version get deleted, and it looked like a good place to end. Well, it wasn't. Today (or, rather, yesterday by now) I went to replay the game and while I planned to skip the whole thing up to Golden Claw quest, now I see that I can't. Too much Ellie's mental health is coming into way. :D**

**RainbowWhisper - Ah, write as long as you wish! "You're a talkative one, aren't you." as Vilkas used to say. And I enjoy reading very much.**

**But I failed at everyday update. Youtube Vilkas harem (insert big, sparkly heart there) proved itself to be too much a distraction. Just as "Everyday I'm Shufflyn'" Skyrim vids. Me, I'm being such a rag. Sorry, guys! ):**

**An especially bad writing today, since I was sleepy, and I don't know how to make it right now.**

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><p>I don't know what madness made me think that it all would end there. Of course it hadn't, as I was tactlessly reminded by my Nord companion.<p>

"It looks like only we made it." he mused, looking on a body lying near the table. "You can take Gunjor's equipment, he's not going to need it anymore."

Oh, thanks, Madness. You just made it a little bit worse. How does one strip a man of his clothing? Dead man, to boot?

Raloff sighed seeing me fumbling with straps with those shaking hands of mine and crouched next to me, helping me with my grim task.

"Come on, lass. We don't have time for this." he said, getting last buckles open. "Now strip."

"What!" I cried out in suprise. Now, that wasn't a game line! But... hey, that had to be an armor thing. Sure, I wouldn't be able to get it on all by myself. "Oh, right." I mumbled, pulling my shirt over my head.

"Good girl" he praised me distractedly, dressing me in his fallen friend's clotching. "Now, grab the axe and swing it few times for a try. The fun is just starting."

"I never had such a thing in my hands before." I admitted, on the verge of tears.

He shoot me a serious glance.  
>"Then you better pray to the gods to be a fast learner."<p>

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><p>"Now, quiet. They have to be Imperials" Raloff whispered when the sound of heavy steps echoed in the corridor.<br>Knowing what came next, I hid myself behind him, actually considering his advice."

My back glued to the wall, I took small swing with my waraxe at the first Imperial that got through my new friend. The heavy thing not having enough force to actually hurt him only knocked him down, and I stood and looked at him in shock.

"End him, girl! He wouldn't spare you!" Raloff called behind me "And get the hell over there to help."

I crouched near my victim and took another swing. I felt as a executioner, and seeing terror in his eyes doesn't exactly help. But soon Imperial's head rolled on the floor, sick sound of cleaved flesh and bone echoing in the hall.  
>Then I looked at the blood-splashing body. And the darkness claimed me.<p>

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><p>The first thing I felt while slipping out of the darkness grisp was a burning sensation in my mouth and strong, warm hand patting on my back. Old methods always the best, huh?<p>

"Now, lass. Everything is gonna be alright." soothing voice came, when I slowly opened my eyes. My head was spinning, but I forced myself to myself with the help of Raloff. I looked around to see what happened.  
>And that was definitely bad decision. Believe me, the sight of severed heads and splitted guts is not the one that girl want to see first in the morning.<p>

When I finished throwing up at the blood-splattered floor, the Nord got me up again.

"First battle, huh?" he asked compassionately.

"Yeah" I answered between catching my breath. "Never seen that much blood before."

He looked at me seriously.

"So you better get used, lass. There's long road to freedom to us, and in Skyrim, you won't be able to escape seeing fights now and then."

"I know, I know" I panted, already feeling better. "I just need to calm my shaking hands and we can get moving."

"Now, that's my girl" he smiled to himself, already getting away.

"Wait!" I called suddenly.

"Lass, I wont leave..."

"No, that's not it!" I declared, gesturing my hands wildly at the corpses "We're going to need money, right!"

He shot me a slightly amused look of appreciation. "Now, I like the way you think, lass!"

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><p>When Raloff and I stripped the corpses of anything valuable, and he showed me how to place my loot on my body for it to weight me down as little as possible, we set out again. To tell the truth, I always found the games concept of running around with the several sets of armor comical, but now I was doing exactly the same thing. Well, fate, I suppose.<p>

Before going away I forced myself to look closely at the wounds as long as possible.

"What the hell are you doing, lass?" reached me the slightly annoyed voice of my Nord friend.

"Getting used to the sight of blood and hacked bones" I answered as calmly as I could. "Me fainting in the midst of battle is not going to do us any good."

"If you think so." he said, but hadn't looked convinced.

"Now, I think I'll be alright. We can go now." I told him, heading out to the kitchen.

And know what? I lied.


	4. Chapter 4

**Still in the prologue, aren't we? And we'll stay there for a momen't too. About five more chapters to meeting the Companions. I find this chap stupid and lifeless, but well. It turned that way, and it will probably stay so.**

**The things I hate: hasn't played Skyrim today, and is being problematic. But is it just me, or the chapters started to get longer and more personalised? :D**

**Diamond1502 - thank you for your kind words!**

**And just so you know. Yes, I'd totally eat in that situation. Eating calms me up greatly.**

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><p>We headed out to the kitchen, not meeting anyone in the process. Of course that doesn't mea that we get there without problems, since the dragon decided it a good time to ruin the passage of the fort, but that wasn't as stressing as a people trying to downright kill me.<p>

And there were no shortage of them, it would seem. We sneaked as silently as we possibly could behind the barrels, cautious not to allarm them. I corrected my grip on my new dagger - the waraxe proved to be too heavy - and followed Raloff, approaching the Imperials.

It looked like I wasn't the only one unable to get things right, since this time it was his turn to fail. He stumbled upon iron pot and fallen on the floor, making unbearably much noise. The guard turned around... and met my knife in his eye. I pushed harder, making his scull crack under pressure, his pained scream filling the room. I got my hands slippery with the spilled eye, brain and blood, but didn't cared at the moment, feeling sharp pain filling my right side. I stepped forward, hearing death howl just behind me and knowing that Raloff helped me out once again.

I let him take care of the archer while I was looking for some water to wash my hands. Finding a bucket, I let out a contended sight.

"Grab anything what can be of use, lass, and get going!" he called behind me.

"Wait a moment, I've got to eat!" I objected. He watched me for a moment, then nodded.

"I didn't thought that you have a stomach for this, but fine. I haven't had much to eat myself lately." then added: "Just be silent. We don't want more Imperials walking on us without weapons in our hands."

I nodded silently, already grabbing a piece of roasted beef and a leaf of bread.

"And while you are at it, you may want to check these barrels for potions. Looks like you might need them."

I was ready to answer something along the lines 'I will manage', when I realized, that he was telling the truth. The pain in my side didn't lessen an one bit, and looking down, I saw a trickle of blood running down my leg.

"Now, don't faint on me again, lass" he warned me.

"I won't." I assured him faintly, rushing toward the barrels.

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><p>While still sickening, a feeling of a soft flesh giving way to my knife stopped making my hands halt. Especially in the prison, where I was perfectly content to end the torturer's life. The man was pain in ass and I had to be patched up greatly by Raloff afterwards, but I was sure he deserved every unit of pain I managed to give him.<p>

"Hey, lass. I found some lockpicks, if you are any good with them." my friend called across the room.

"I'm not, but I can try! Get them over there." I answered, taking a closer look on the lock of the prison cage. I actually lockpicked only one lock ever, and it was my diary's primitive lock, but hey, it couldn't be so different!

To my sheer suprise, it wasn't. It had only two flaps, and even if i broke a fragile lockpick two or three times, it was actually quite easy to open, especially when I noticed the place that was worn with the key's usage.

I dragged the body out of the cage and took care of it's clothing. I knew that it was quite valuable, and light to carry, so I forced myself not to think about how wrong it was to loot bodies. And failed, as usual.

"You ready, lass?" Raloff asked, slowly walking out of the prison.

"As much as I'll ever be." I admitted grimly.

"Good, you first then." he commanded.

"What!"

"You heard me, lass. I've got to favor my knee for a moment untill the potion will heal it completely. You go first and make sure it's safe." seeing that I was ready to protest, he added with a sigh: "See, lass, we don't have time for this. We can die every moment."

I had to agree with him, hoping that nothing dangerous will cross my patch. Oh, how little I had known.

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><p>I *knew* that something will go wrong. I had that feeling in my gut. And I wasn't mistaken.<p>

I couldn't hear heavy Imperial boots, so I continued without concern. After the simple, careless turn around the corner, I was confronted with my worst nightmare.

That bloody spider cave. How could I forget?

It was already too late. Overgrown arachnids saw my movements with their countless eyes and began to get close to me. Too close. The cracking sound of their thin legs' movements made me panic, as well as the sight of the poison, dripping freely from their overgrown fangs. The only way go get rid of them in-game was a fire spell...

Wait, a fire spell? I've always got it at the start, so I should be able to cast it. Everyone would. But how do you cast a spell in the first place?

I forced myself to think, my back glued to the wall. I still had a few moments. There was once a book in Morrowind. That one in the Mage Guild questline. How it was, again? "Believe, feel, that the sky is green, that fishes can fly, that the water is air that you can breathe as it fills your lungs?" Now, girl, try! Your left hand starts a fire, a big, nice, hot fire that can burn big, bad spiders! Oh, come on, air molecules colliding with each other, growing warmer and warmer...

The spider nipped at my leg.

...a godsdamned deodorant firethrower!

When I oppened my eyes again I couldn't actually ever imagine being that much suprised in my life. The whole bunch of spiders laid at my feet, turned into the ashes. Now, thinking of that, deodorant flamethrower was the closest thing I've ever seen to that fire spell. Maybe that was it. Or something else. Or...

"Good job, lass. I knew you're going to make it." I felt Raloff hand on my shoulder.

"Y-you knew!" I screamed in uttermost shock.

"Shh, girl. Not so loud." he reprimanded me. "No, I didn't. But I knew that you could manage, no matter which noble family you dragged your sorry ass from ."

"Excuse me?" I stared at him "Where did you get that idea from?"

"Well, lass, isn't it obvious? With your soft skin, undamaged hands and a great distaste of blood, did you really think you could hide it? If you were cooking your own meals, you would have to skin an animal once or twice, after all." looking at expression on my face, he assured me "Don't worry, lass, your secret is safe with me."

"No, it's not..."

"Now, lass, I don't want to hear another word. But I believed that you wanted to get rich. Grab a bottle and gather that spider venom. It's valuable thing around there."


	5. Chapter 5

**RainbowWhisper - that's the best part! He cannot kill his shield sister and get away with it! (*evil snicker*) **

**Oh, and assignements... Well, I'm doing main storyline, so he has to know his place, AND THAT IS IN THE KITCHEN! :D Oh God, that was satisfying. So damn weird, but satisfying. I cannot wait for the moment I can actually crack the whole story up in the Jorvaskrr, going out drinking and off-charing characters! :D THAT'S gonna be fun!**

**And blood... I wasn't thinking about blood when I started to write this, and that was a huge mistake. Murdering someone in-game looks pretty easy, but slaughtering someone who actually can wield a blade... well. Not so easy in real-life :D **  
><strong>And the important thing I forget was that I can eat raw meat, but cannot cut a bit of beef without being disgusted by the feeling. And I'm a pacifist who maybe hit someone about three times in her whole life. And is scared to death by spiders. So I probably already went off-character from my personality, but that's something that had to be done.<strong>

**About a "deodorant flamethrower" - that was another hard thing to do. She had to learn to use magic, and fast, because most of enemies are only possible to kill with fire on the lower levels. That was actually the main reason why I hasn't skipped all of this. **

**And good to hear that I'm not the only mad person there. :D**

**Beware - it's a filler chapter, never meant to be here.**

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><p>With the moment we saw the daylight pouring into the cave and felt fresh air on our faces, hope found it's place in my heart. It was hard to believe this beautiful, unspoiled world could be actually evil and deathly.<p>

Of course, that hope was quickly scattered by my Nord companion, who hid behind a rock as soon as possible.

"Wait." He whispered, pointing out the dragon. After a short while, when the beast vanished on the horizon, he added: "This place will be full of Imperials in the matter of moments. We would better get out of there, quick."

I pulled a face.

"Thanks for ruining the moment for me. Not everyday a girl gets out of Imperial dungeon alive, you know!"

His stressed expression softened.

"I know, girl." he made sure that nothing - and no-one - dangerous was around, and started to walk down the mountain road. "You know, in Riverwood, the town nearest to us, lives my sister Gedur. I'm sure she'll help you out."

With a soft, appreciating smile on his face, he added: "Good luck, lass. I'm sure I wouldn't make it without you today."

I smiled in return.

"Well, I wouldn't be so sure about it. I'm pretty sure a skilled warrior like you would get out twice as fast without me slowing him down."

He actually grinned at me.

"Remember, lass. It's not important how fast you are, what matters is *how* you do it. Nobody taught you that?"

Now, that was awkward. I felt myself blush a little and cursed my dirty mind.

"No, unfortunately. But mine "how" is of a pretty bad quality, as well."

He patted me on the back.

"Listen, you should give yourself more credit. You actually made it pretty well for a fragile damsel in distress."

He chuckled at my groan.

"I'm *not* a damsel in distress!"

"Well, maybe you should told me that a while ago, I wouldn't be helping you out."

"Alright, alright, I get it. You shouldn't rob men of their sense of self-importance."

"Exactly, lass. But jokes aside, no warrior can watch their own back." he looked at me, seeming to be considering something. "You should think of joining our cause."

I knew that he would as me that, but glared at him, nonetheless.

"You're joking, right? Me, fighting in a rebellion?"

He only shook his head.

"You ought to have more faith in yourself."You're a very talented one. You learn fast. And I'd be glad to teach you myself, if you would be willing."

What? Now, to belive that I was a natural serial killer, and seeing me as regular soldier? Now, there had to be something wrong with that man.

...but passing by the free lesson that could keep me alive? That would be really stupid.

I sighed unhappily and forced myself to look in his eyes.

"It's not that I'm not honored, but I don't think that would be a good idea. Look, it's not like I don't believe in your cause, it's just..." I searched for the right words for a moment, then given up. "I'm a coward. I'm really afraid of dying and thought of fighting on the true battlefield scares me to death."

He gave me a long, strange look.

"Not exactly the attiude I'd wish in a fresh recruit, but a good one, nevertheless." when I stared at him, he simply turned his head away, looking thoughtfully on the horizon. "You know, it's not the thing I'd like to admit, but a soldier who doesn't fear death is either a very lucky... or a very dead one."

He looked me in the eyes again.

"And you, lass, look both lucky and sensible to me."

Seeing my saddened expression, he patted me on the back.

"Now, lass. Don't let it get to you, melancholy doen't become on such pretty face..."

I stopped listening to him, feeling a slight tugging at the edge of my mind.

"Hey, can you feel it, too?" I asked him, distracted at the foreign sensation.

He stared at me confused for a moment.

"Feel what, lass?"

"That... thing. Like something called me slightly to it, mad itself presence known, tapped its fingers slighty at my brain..." I strived to find words to describe it the best as I was able to.

He shook his had.

"No, I don't feel anythinhg like this, lass. Sounds like magic to me."

"I-I think I'll go and check it, whatever it is..." I uttered, not being entirely sure it was actually wise.

Raloff stared at me as an madwoman for a moment, then sighed.

"And I took you for a sensible woman. Go, if you must." he pointed to the small cleaing down the road "If you try, you'll see the wooden rooftops over there. This is Riverwood. I'll be waiting for you, so try to don't get youself killed." he smiled warmly "I saw that you are able to do this today."

* * *

><p>I wished him goodbye, and feeling more crazy with every step I took in the direction of the soft tingling. Really, how stupid can one be to refuse company of a skilled warrior to go and check some possibly dangerous feeling. Off the road, to boot. That had to end in tears.<p>

But to tell the truth, I hadn't regretted my decision. As they say, curiosity killed a cat and I always associated myself with that furry little creature. If I was to never know what was that thing that was nagging me, I would just head out there in the middle of some sleeples night, and *then* get myself killed. It was always a lot more safe in the daylight.

Or so I reasoned to myself.

Luckily enough, I haven't met anything dangerous on my way, as the tingling get stronger and stronger. It started to be not only a mental distraction, and become a full-body sensation. I started to feel unntaturally warm, but not in the feverish way. It felt rather as if I was sitting by the safe fireplace, sipping on the warm drink, pleasant and comforting.

When the trees gave a way to the small platform, I could finally see what drew me to itself. It was a big, stone pillar, somewhat shorter than me, but seeming to be bigger than it actually was. In somewhat the two- thirds of its height was situated a round hole, and under it a schematic drawing of an old, bearded man.

The Stone of the Mage.

Not really understanding what I was doing, I reached my hand and touched the man's face. The feeling that followed... That comforting, warm sensation grew stronger, flowing from the warm stone, filled me completely, untill it pounded under my scull, making me feel stronger. The pillar grew colder, it's warmth passing on me, resonating in me. I could hear my blood rushing in my ears...

Then it all gradually calmed down. The soothing feeling in me grew duller, as previously did the warmth of the stone. I could still sense it's pulsating energy, but I could also say that part of it stayed with me, making me stronger inside.

Man, if that was a simple Stone's blessing, how will the Word learning will feel?

I shivered slightly both on the thought, and from the cold wind that started blowing in my face.

And that was the second time I actually noticed my surroundings.

I was standing on the middle of the mountain, surrounded by the pine trees and mountain flowers. Everything was fresh and alive, foreign birds singing their praises to the world below. The river down the valley was reflecting in its crystal-clean waters both the mountains and the clouds hanging low on their slopes, touching trees and covering them in mist.

Forgetting the Stone, I stepped down the platform and began walking towards the rushing stream. Dodging through the trees, I started to laugh happily when the red fox passed me by, so close that I almost could touch it.

I was still laughing when I rushed into the ice-cold water.

I was alive and free.

Just then I saw the glimpse of silver near to me, and started to merrily chase slamons in the mountain stream.

I might be mad, but I had never been so happy in my whole life.


	6. Chapter 6

**RainbowWhisper - that's why you kill them. WITH FIRE. Not getting close, even in-game.**

**Haha, I'm a lover of a raw meat! My mom gets sick at the sight of me eating it, but I find it actually more tasty than the cooked one. :D Ah, these primeval insticts~~**

**And just today my friend told me that she didn't do a Companions questline. Because. They're. Werevolves.**

**Now, imagine that!**

**And about Vilkie... He's so damn cute when he opens up finally. I usually play a cinematic version, but curiosity made me play in my own language version. And his voice was so soft and nice, especially compared to the raspy Farkas. And to think I initially preferred his brother... But luckily, I have this thing for not-bulky, intelligent men with hair they take care of. Not to mention, using so cute goth/emo eyeshadow! :D (but to tell the truth, if I ever saw a man like him on the street, I'd run like hell. My brother saw me playing Skyrim once and asked me something along the lines of: "Who the hell is that ruffian you're hanging out with?" and it was hard to not to say "But bro, his my hubby whom I love more than my game life! D:") xD**

**But enough of spamming around, there is another filler chapter! About three more before we get to the Jorvaskrr! :D**

* * *

><p>By the time I reached the Riverwood I was entirely wet and happy.<p>

I got there just in time to hear the last words of the family reunion, Raloff telling his nephew to listen to his mother. I waited for a while, until they parted, everyone going back to their occupations, leaving a blonde nord woman alone.

"I was told to report to you when I arrive." I smiled at her "You're Gedur, right?"

She looked suprised by my sudden appearance, but answered my smile with her own

"Yes. You have to be that girl that my brother just told us about. What was your name again?"

I started to tell her my real name, but stopped myself just before the word escaped my lips.

"...Eleima." I corrected myself.

She shoot me a sharp look, but hasn't questioned me, for what I was grateful. I didn't know why I didn't want to use my true name. Maybe because I've never actually liked it, or it just didn't felt... right, it was just too normal? Now, it wasn't really important, was it?

"Alright... Eleima." she said it with that short pause, indicating that she didn't believe me a one bit. "Here, take this key. It's a key to our house. You can stay there as long as you wish."

Now, I was beggining to believe that every single Nord was mad. That woman just caught me at obvious lie and concealing my true personality, and she still gave me a key to her house? I know that in game you had a game script, but here... damn, I could be a common rogue, a thief or a bandit, or even an Thalmor spy, for all she knew!  
>...But if she was crazy anyways, asking her wouldn't hurt.<p>

"When we're at this, could you provide me with some supplies? I'm away from home, and..."

She only nodded her head.  
>"I understand. I'll check what useful I can give you, and leave it at home. I'm sure you'll find it."<p>

That woman was positively insane. She'd rather give something useful to me than to her own brother, or even sell it for profit, if she doesn't actually need it? ...but wait, I believe that I heard about her being an owner of the lumber mill... I suppose that she can afford it.

Or she's just actually kind. Or wants to murder you in your sleep. Whatever you choose.

Just to not to impolitely drop conversation with my possible benefactor, I added:

"I barely escaped the death from the dragon in Helgen, with the great help of your brother."

She smiled slightly at me, seemingly proud of her sibling.

"Yes, he already mentioned this. And, anyway..." her smile grew wider "You look like somebody who just saw the dragon."

Yes, Gedur. That was so nice thing to mention. I believe I liked you better on the screen.

"Is that really that bad?"

She chuckled, looking amused by my exasperation.

"Am I to believe that you get into the river not even taking a look of yourself?"

Oh, yes. Big, pretty mirrors are rather uncommon around there. But maybe Thalmor has some...? Now, that would be a good reason to join. They would take you in with their arms open, for sure!

"Well... yes, actually." I winked at the Nord "I'm not that kind of woman, you know."

"Mmmm... and what kind of woman would that be...?"

She laughed at my expression.

"I don't have much more time to waste today, girl, but I'd be pleased to talk to you later. Now go and change clothes, my spare dress should fit you, more or less. Shoo, shoo!"

She dismissed me happily, and went in the direction of the man taking care of the big log nearby, probably to scold him and point out his mistakes, as a proper woman should.

After that little talk the firs thing I did was unsuprisingly taking a good look at myself in the mirror of the water. With the wet, sticking hair and clothing I really was a pitful sight, looking both dirty and poor. Now I finally knew why I provoked charity from strangers...

The whole time I was taking in my current appearance, I had a feeling of remnants of my common sense tugging at my mind. Something was...

I kneeled near the water and looked down once more. And then I got what was wrong. I was subconsciously expecting to see the ugly face of my game character.

I actually sighted relieved. It was good that this time it was nothing dangerous, and well... while not beautfiul, I wasn't also ugly, and I believed that my youthful face, even if flawed, looked better than the plastic one of my computer self, especially considering that I couldn't actually get it right.

When there was nothing more left that I had to to take care of fast, I considered my options. I could stay there all day, looking at myself, but while pleasant, it was also entirely unproductive, and I thought I could feel my body going stiff due to the cool air an my wet clothing. I could also go change into nice, dry clotching, and probably I should do that, but still I favored going to bed in the clean clothing, so there was only one alternative left. And that was why I went to drag my sorry ass around the town in my sorry state. Maybe I could see how many people I could make to feel resentful towards me? Now, that was a fine thing to test, in the name of my wicked curiosity!

My first target was a Valerius' shop. While not being actually happy about me dipping water on their wooden floor, they accepted me with enthusiasm when I declared that I would be willing to retrieve their property for them. When I'll be already rested and healthy, of course. That had to be done anyway, so I hadn't given it a second thought, focusing on the things of the real importance - and that would be money!

Oddly enough, the man seemed to like me more the more I argued with him about the items' prices. I wasn't and idiot and knew about how much my things were worth, but then again, he was a merchant. These little meanies seem to be always greedy, even if they are the world's kindest people in their personal lives, and this was no exception.

But even with the mean trader, when our arguments already faded away, I was impressed with the amount of coin I had gained so far. I was rich enough to buy a horse, a room in an inn, and start saving for my own Witherun house.

I smiled warmly at the Valerius siblings and asked a question that was nurturing me for a while now.  
>"What are you cooking in that pot anyway, Camilla? It actually smells nice."<p>

She smiled proudly at me.

"Thank you very much, but that's just a simple dish. A soup made from a cabbage and apples."

I grinned happily. It was hard to not to love the girl.

"Is sound tasty. Would you mind letting me have a bit?"

And she let me, sure enough. I got a big, wooden bowl filled to the brinks with steaming, weird but sweet food. And as someone wise once told me - if they give you food, they nave to be a good people.  
>After I finished to eat, and thanked my wonderful host, she was so eager to give me her notebook with recipes she used that she nearly knocked the table down. Twice.<p>

Now it was confirmed. All the people around there was insane, but I came to think that I prefer that kind-hearted madness to the cold sanity that used to surround me.

I'd be satisfied with this visit being the final accent of my day, but I had one more thing to take care of.  
>Not thinking much I headed to the Sleeping Giant Inn.<p>

* * *

><p>The task I set for myself turned out to be harder than I thought even before I actually started.<p>

"Who actually told you something like this!" Delphine eyed me suspiciously.

"Nobody, really. It's just like... Look, you have an inn. In the potentially ill-protected town. And I'm to believe that you cannot teach me anything about wielding a blade?" I groaned inwardly. Why had I ever started that? I knew that this woman was paranoid.

"I don't think I can teach you anything you don't know already."

"That's the problem! I don't know anything. Please, Delphine. Just the basics!" I looked at her with my best teary-eyed look.

I was actually amazed when it worked. She sighted heavily and given in to my pleas.

"Alright. But just the basics."

* * *

><p>Walking out from the inn, I was met with scrutinising glare of another Nord woman. After a short analysis, she looked me in the eye, before actually talking to me.<p>

"You're pretty, I'll give you that. Just stay away from my husband, Alvor." she said, then passed me by, coming inside.

I stood there for a moment longer. Well, that had to be Sigurd, the blacksmith's wife. Charmed. Nice to meet you too.

And then I had an idea that made me grin mischeviously. Stay away, yes? Now, now. Such a shame that I need to get stronger fast, and knowing a thing or two about an armor and weapons' strong and weak points wouldn't hurt, isn't it?

Luckily, Alvor himself wasn't actively opposed to having an additional pair of hands to help.

* * *

><p>It was really much easier to convince Faendal to be my archery teacher, anyway. I mourned dearly every piece of gold I was going to have to pay him for training, but it wasn't exactly hard to convince him to spending most of his afternoons with me. It looks like the man has the thing for the human girls, after all.<p>

When I get to the Raloff's sister's home, it was already getting dark, and I wasn't exactly in my best form to converse with anyone. I just threw myself on the pointed bed and fell asleep in the matter of moments.

Yes, even with the hay getting into my mouth.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey, 8 people added this story to their story alert, and three more people faved it. To hells with me if I know why anyone would do something like that, but thanks you guys! And please, if you take time to storyalert, take your time to comment, as well!**

**Another filler chapter! Oh, how I love writing the dialogue. But well, I don't actually write this. It writes itself, so I blame this story for it's form!**

**And God, how anyone could actually translate Bleak Falls into something that translates back into Blackstone? Does these people have no soul!**

**And Vilkas news for this chap: "Vilkas may be randomly encountered out in the wilderness." :D  
>I like the sound of that, and you?<strong>

**PS.: I was writting this all day long and I feel completely drained and close to passing out. Also haven't played anything for three days by now, and my winter ferries are close to end. I'm doomed.**

* * *

><p>Not counting the straw- filled bed (really, there every night is a tumble in a hay) the next passing week was the one of the most idyllic in my life. Every morning I get up with the sun, helping Gedur with her work around the house, then I headed out to the Alvor's place to help him with his forge. I was aching and worn-out after that, but really happy. Creating even the simplest things from something as crude as a iron bar gave me a lot of satisfsction. After some rest near the river, I usually went to play with village children, learning their tales and games, and telling them some of these I knew from my own childhood. After a warm noon meal I w was having private training sessions with Raloff or Faendal, and after that I headed to the inn for some more fighting advice from Delphine, and working as a serving girl on the evenings. If I had a moment of the free time, I used it to practice a destruction magic. I was getting better and better in everything I tried my hand in. I've never worked so much in my entire life, but I've been never waking up so well-rested, as well.<p>

I loved these people, and with time, they started to love me in return. Everywhere I went, I was greeted by the kind smiles and nice words, even Sigurd warming up to me, after all, not minding me pestering her husband all morning... as much as before.

It was hard to believe that only an one week passed, when Raloff decided to tell everyone that he was leaving for a Windhelm.

"You really are a quick learner, lass. I'm really proud of you." he told me with a fatherly look on his face. Well, I guess that's why he wasn't available to the marriage, then. "You really going to manage, both going adventuring and fighting in a real battle."

He looked at me thoughtfully.

"Have you thought through joining our side?"

I knew what he meant, but I shook my head negativelly.

"I think I need some more time to myself before I'm able to stand amongst your people as an equal, and I don't want to be a burden."

He nodded, his eyes soft and understanding.

"I get it, lass. You're right, being considerate. There is already enough of hot-headed youths in our ranks." his gaze turning joking, he added "And this old man is not free of this flaw as well."

We laughed together for a short moment, before there came time for a real farewell.

"Believe it or not, I'll consider it. I suppose I'll join you in your fight for free Skyrim" I winked at him "After all, the rebelious and proud blood of my fathers still flows in my veins."

With suprise, I found out that I was telling the truth, even if not the way he might understand it. I felt that need to fight for the others, to free that country from the foreign rule and to right all the wrongs. No matter what kind of man Ulfric Stormcloak really was, I identified with his goals.

He smiled at me proudly once again.

"Learn and get stronger, lass. I'm looking forward to the day I'm going to be able to call you 'sister'."

And with that, he was gone, and I was left with that feeling of anxiety starting to nag its way into my mind.

* * *

><p>Mere days later, I coudn't stand it anymore. I had to be something someday, and decided that was the right moment to help my new friends to regain their property.<p>

I headed in the indicated Black Fallows direction, knowing that I'm going the right way when the green started to give a way to the snow and the cold, cruel wind.

I wasn't really minding my sorrounding, so the arrow that stuck in my arm made me stop in my tracks. Oh, right. I was in front of the bandits' lair, that silly ruined tower. Only now it doesn't looked funny. It looked dangerous and threatening.

Another arrow passed by by the time I rushed forward to meet eye-to-eye with an axe-wielding brute. In my suprise I made the first thing that came to my mind: treated the thug with my beloved fire spell.

The man's hair catched on fire, and he looked in my eyes with the look of the uttermost shock before he started screaming, his face twisted in pain. His skin cracking under the magical fire's flames, he threw himself into the snow, rolling madly in his agony, untill there was no life left in his horribly massacred body.

Now I understood why Nord didn't like magic. It was horrible to see something like this, but to be guilty of such a death.. It left a foul taste in my mouth.

...until the time his fellows made a point of trying to tear me to pieces.

Again, with suprise I realised that people of Riverwood taught me well. I ducked under the bandit's arm and sticked my knife in his back. The thug fell, earning me a roar of hatred from his companions. I was smalled than them, and used a much lighter weapon, so I made my best in trying my possible speed on them. I haven't escaped it unscrathed, but I made it alive and well. Maybe Raloff was right, maybe I actually was an natural murderer... I mused, standing surronded by the dead bodies of the men bred and born to kill, me, who mere days ago wouldn't be able to lift half of the loot I was carrying away from this place now.

'Or something wants you to be' answered the tiny voice in the back of my mind. I shook my head. Both thoughts weren't too comforting, but I preffered the first answer. I've always been fast to learn what I set my mind on, after all. 'Natural, then' - I smiled to myself while continued my way to the top.

But... which top was that? I looked around, disoriented. Each direction looked fine to me.  
>I reached for a simple compass and a map that I get from Gedur, trying to shield them from the wet, nasty snow that could damage them, and shook my head in disbelief again, this time amazed by my own stupidity. For about ten minutes I was walking in the wrong direction.<p>

* * *

><p>The savages in front of the Bleak Fallows temple were even easier to remove, partly because Faendal was a good hunting teacher and partly because of the snow obscuring the view. To my amusement, I was left with more loot I could carry before even entering the ruins. Well, I should probably stop picking up everything I saw, especially these useless iron axes...<p>

Having a choice between leaving some of the heavy and useless trash right there, and returning to Riverwood to sell it, I think that my decision was really easy to predict. I turned on my hell and headed back to the village.

"You already back?" Lucan asked me suprised when I walked right into his shop. "How it went?"

I shook my head.

"I'm not done yet. I've only came here to sell some loot I already gathered."

He looked disappointed, but as happy as always to rip me off of the gold that shoud have passes to me. Afted a long while spend on playful bickering, we came to the agreement. I got about one thousand gold pieces and a some lockpicks, and he was left with a pile of the leather armor and useless (at last to me) big, pointy objects.

"You know Ellie, if you continue to supply me with this amount of murder weapons, I'll have to make new trade contacts, and what will I do with all of that additional money?"

"You could start with paying me more, you meanie!" we laughted. "And I thought that you was a good man, then you went around selling strangers a godsdamned *lockpicks*. What if I wanted to steal from you?"

"Oh, you wouldn't! I know that deep down you're a good girl." He winked at me "But I'd better warn you, if you weren't, I'd had to have my sister take care of you!"

"Now you frightened me to death, good sir!" I pouted my lips playfully "What is a poor, little girl to do, confronted with such a treat?"

"Get her sorry ass from bothering a poor, little salesman to doing somethig actually useful, like helping mentioned salesman out!" he smiled "Good luck on your way."

"Sir, yes sir!" I saluted him, and ran out from his shop, still laughing.

* * *

><p>I was really annoyed at the bandits stupidity. Sure, it made me have an upper hand and being able to survive at all, but... man, with their friends killed for more than about a hour, they are having a random chit-chat and aren't even preserving the basic securituy measures? It's a wonder they were still alive by the time I get to them, few arrows from the darkness solving the problem. And I wasn't even a good archer.<p>

The same could be said about the locked chest. Apart from locking your own things inside something you don't have a key to, it broke open nerly without trying be a person who was doing it about a sixth time in her life. And yes, that would be me.

More and more pissed off for no real reason, I stopped in my tracks, feeling something light and sticky make contact with my face.

And then I had to force down the scream.

The. Godsdamned. Spider. Web.

AAaaargh! Why does They hate me so!

* * *

><p>Luckily enough, I haven't met any spiders, being confronted with a gigantic mutant rats instead. I was never a rat hater, and even owned one on my own, but these creatures were filthy, to say at least, and it was hard to be enthusiastic about their worm-like tails. I was brooding for a long while by then, even killing a several more bandits - especially killing several more bandits, I corrected myself - couldn't improve my mood.<p>

And then I found myself in front of a puzzle. That stupid one with moving pillars. At my state of mind, I was angry at everything and everyone around for crossing my patch, but here, I had to slow down and cool a little. I always used to check the possible combinations one-by-one when I was unsure which one was right, but now...

Enough to say I didn't felt in the mood for being pierced by multiple, possibly poisoned arrows. I analysed the pattern for a long while, and then made a hasty decision. After all, I've never actually been known for a common sense.

When the sounds of the working mechanism subsided, I was actually suprised to see myself in one piece. I gave a loud, relieved sigh as I felf tension leaving my body, deciding that it was the right place to take a short break.

I took out my lunch and started chewing at it, looking absent-mindely on the candle flames. What was that kept them from burning away, I wondered. But not like it mattered.

* * *

><p>After my self-announced lunch break I continued my walk toward the glory... wait, that came out totally wrong, doesn't it? I was stepping down the stupid, old stairs that somehow stayed intact in a place like this, fighting the idiotic mutant rats. But the worst was just to come, like it always did.<p>

Why? Well, mainly because after tumbling down the stairs painfully, I found myself face-to-jaws with the biggest spider I have seen so far. The beast was twice as high as me, and many times more dangerous.

All I had time to do was to roll away from it, and spring to my feet as soon as possible. The enourmous arachnid saw me moving with its giant, disgusting eyes, and followed my every move with them, getting more and more close to me. I ducked on the left, and regreted for a moment my choice of weapon. With a longsword, I could possibly hope to hack the creature's legs before it even came close to me.

Starting to run, I strained every left bit of my self-control, making a gesture summoning a small flame to my oustretched hand. I told a short prayer and focused my whole attention on the beast, raining fire at it's enormous limbs. I managed to escape it's efforst to catch me, and luckily enough, even that monster was lying at my feet, twitching in agony. I might never again use a spell against another human creature, but for a degeneration like this, I was sure it deserved every inch of pain I could cause to it, and I didn't care in the slighestif I was right or wrong.

"Hey, you there! Help me!" I heard a muffled scream from the other side of the hall, and was reminded about the golden claw's thief. I surely took my sweet time, searching the room for anything of worth.

"Free me! Now!" the man demanded, still tangled in the spider web by the time I took my interest in him.

Without a word, I burned through the sticky threads, making the man fall on his knees. In the matter of moments the dark elf started getting rid of the remnants of the disgusting substance, then took a long look at me.

"You doesn't actually think that I'm going to share the tearsure with anybody, do you?" he mocked me, and begun running.

I was prepared for this, but this sudden outburst took me offguard anyway.

I followed him as quick as I could, but the man was faster. He dissapeared behind the corned, and before I coud catch up with him, the dried out corpse came into my way.

Draugrs. Just fine.

I dodged the hit of his rusty sword and blazed him with fire. The body with no water in it that could possibly stop the magical flame burned fast, leaving only weapons lying before me on the floor.

And then I heard a loud click, followed by even louder scream.

Wonderful, my day was getting better with every passing moment. The bloody fool I tried to save just managed to get himself killed.

I just wondred that he haven't hissed "My precioussss!" while dying.

* * *

><p>After almost stepping in the same trap that killed the poor guy, getting rid of more undead, and checking every passed corpse with fire to not get suprised with my attention turned somewhere else, I found myself in front in another thing from my worst nightmares.<p>

The mechanical blades. Four of them, situated on the distance much longer that I could get through in the safe amount of time. I just wished that I did this mission after obtaining the Whirlwind Shout, but reprimanded myself momentarily. That one came after the one I was currently chasing. Now I really coud do nothing more but pray.

And pray I did. I took a deep breath to calm myself, and as soon as I saw blades pass each other, I launched into run.

...and it worked. Oh, gods, it worked! I was so happy that I threw my backpack on the ground and started hugging it franctically. Oh, gods, I made it alive! Oh, how I wish that there was anyone else that I could embrace, who would hug me back and laugh with me!

...but for that I'd have to wait a little, wouldn't I? I smirked to myself, satisfied with the thought, my breathing calming down slowly.

When I was able to finally walk straight once againg, I continued my eventful journey.

And of course, I get myself in trouble once again. I walked straight at a resstles draugr, who awaited me with a sword in its hands. I was lucky enough that with the state of his armament he could barely bruise me with it, but the dangerous flame in his eyeholes reminded me why I should be afraid.

He wasn't as easy to defeat as his brothers and sisters and the hint of intelligence in his blue gaze told me that he knew how to make use of his previous mage's skills. He raised his hand to smite me with the lighting, but I was faster than the dead man. I stuck my knife in the middle of his palm and jumped away, raining fire on the paper-like muscles. And again and again, untill I've been sure that I can safely take back my darkened weapon.

Of course that wasn't the last of the trials I had to take today. Oh, no. After stepping into the inner sanctuary, as I called the place myself, I was met with another challenge. Or rather, met again with the one of the worst challenges I had ecountered this far.

Hello again, axe-trap. You missed me, didn't you, dear? Bitch.

I was at my ends. The only thing that I knew anymore was that I had to get out from that hell alive. I tried my best to feel the best possible moment to start running, but when I felt an unimaginable pain in my back I knew I failed. Huh. They told you about a luck that a new gambler has their first time, didn't they?

I sat on the floor, seeing stars in the darkness. A fascinating constelations indeed, changing colors and spinning around... what! What are you thinking about, you stupid wench! Drag your bloody hands to your belt, good, exactly like this, now uncork the bottle, yes, good gir, lift it to your lips... Oh come on, try a little harder, you know you can do this...

With the each sip of the healing potion, the darknes subsided and the pain returned, to the point in which I could barely think. Luckily enough, another two potions made it into the bearable ache, distracting but dull.

When I was finally able to move, I looked around. I was sitting in the pool of my own blood. That thought made me sick, so I rushed away, to stop looking at the disturbing image.

I was really happy that the floor was pretty much even, and that I wasn't confronted with another real challenge right away. I saw the infamous Bleak Falls Barrows' door puzzle, that so many people had a problem with passing. I leaned at the door for support and started moving the metal circles to the right positions.

I breathed a sight of relief when everything went well for once. The gate opened, Showing the Hall of Heroes - the magnificent cave, half-poured in water coming from the waterfall going down next to platform that looked like altar.

Something pushed me closer, not even a flock of bats flying over my head in panic stopping me in my way towards the heart of the tomb. As I climbed the dusty, old stairs, I could hear echo of voices of many calling me, urging me closer, to reveal some dangerour and magnificent secret, both blessing and curse.

I came closer, my vision darkening again, my gaze fixed on the blue, flaming letters, burning them into my subconsciousness. Then I felf my brain snap, and reform, creating some unimaginable void in my soul - the place for the full understanding of the feeling I had just experienced, and which name was Fus - the Strenght, the Force.

I hadn't even time to get up from my knees when I heard the tomb's lid shifting, and I knew already what I was going to see turning around.

The draugr sovereign, the one dead in this tomb that could use the Voice - and was as trapped there as me, if I were to fall in that fight.

I sprang to my feet with a knife in one, and the flame in other hand. I looked so pitful, compared to the big undead, strong and faithful even in death. He took the swing with his sparkling greatsword, and the only thing I sould do to avoid being killed was to run away as a coward. Who I was, to face such a hero of old?

But I could. I knew I could. Something in me screamed that I was the importand one, him being dead and insignificant. And then I did the most crazy thing I did since coming there. I turned around and charged at the draugr, knocking him down and rolling away to get to my feet before he coud.

I was no trash, to be despised, even by myself. I could be a rug, but I was MY rug, and nobody was going to change it.

Before I knew what happened, the sovereign was lying on my feet, dead again. I only hoped he could get to the Sovngarde, after all the time that passed.

Once I recovered from the initial shock... I got even more shocked at the way I reacted just mere moments ago. That wasn't myself, not the one I knew. And then I remembered what the Whitebeard said in the game. The moment you get the word, the word begins to be a part of you.

Does that was a meaning of Strenght? To be a master of the situation, to be sure of yourself, and proud of being what you are?

I shuddered. I didn't wanted to become someone else and forget myself just because some dragon or a petty old man said so. But did I actually have a choice?

The growl coming from the depths under the cave snapped me back to the reality. I got away from the place as fast as I could, wishing I could leave behind things I experienced there as well.

When I walked out on the open air, it was already a night. I was returning to the Rivewood virtually on my knees, bend both under the burden of the valuable loot and newly gained responsibility.


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm looking at the last chap and thinking: "What the hell, THAT took me over 7 hours to write! D:"  
>I never knew I had it in me, but today I did exactly the same thing, only for 9 hours this time. I'm starting to hate myself.<strong>

**Temerice- welcome on the board! I love to hear from readers, since it really boosts up my motivation, making me write for the said 7 hours. :D**

**Wait. That's because of you people I'm not doing any of my homework, shoolwork, and I don't even played through main Skyrim questline! To hell with all of you! : D**

**Eating raw meat is not werewolvish, it's perfectly normal, and don't allow them to tell you otherwise! What can I do? It's just too tasty. :D  
>And Farkas annoyed the hell from me, with this constant "Skjor says that I've got the strength of Ysgramor..." comment. Bloody hells, man, that's just plain retarded, stop this! D: But to tell the truth, the thing that really put me off was his "proposal". I know he's the man of action, but he sounded so disinterested... Well, it's a miracle that he's still alive.<strong>

**About spelling. Well. Another language wersion, my natural tendency to misspel names and my horrible notes tends to do this to story. Really, writing last chapter I had problem to decide if I noted ears or rats to make appearance. :D And well. I really wasn't thinking, I was too tired. :D  
>About the blade-trap: I used to think like you, but then I took an arrow... Nah, not going to say that. I'm stronger than that! :D Actually, when you look at this, the only possibility to crawl under it just by the wall, but that would be too dangerous, because you would have to raise your body to move, and I think that the space between blades and the floor is too narrow to fit the human body.<strong>

**Siela77 - I'm too roleplayish and lazy for that : D That was actually the first time I did it at all. And about the feather spell... Now, you have that Steed Stone, companion that is sworn to carry your burdens ( D ) and the things like boots allowing you to carry more. I'm no enchancer, but you cannot "steal" a "feather" spell from the boots or such?**

**And you're scary. D: Really, I kill it with fire, to turn it to ashes to wipe out entirely! And re-animating spiders? Brrrr.  
>But since I claim Vilkas, Farkas is entirely free to have through the course of whole story, isn't he? ;D<strong>

**Random Vilkas news for this chap: "If Vilkas is your follower, he will leave you if you assault or murder an innocent civilian." Awww, my hero! :D**

* * *

><p>After returning from the Bleak Falls Barrow I ended up with a horrible fever. It took Gerdur half a week and a potion to nurse me back to health, but my restlessness form before returned with a double force. I couldn't just lie in bed, or wander around the village. I had that need to go far away, to wander for days, this longing for the unknown. And there came the day I wasn't able to resist it anymore. I said my goodbyes to everyone, thanked for their kind help and set out on the road once again. Alvor asked me to deliver message to Jarl, but that wasn't really important. I just wanted to feel that wind in my hair once again, to feel free from something that kept nurturing me, not allowing me to sleep at night.<p>

That hollow place in my soul that was a Dragon Word.

Travelling allowed me to forget it for a while. I just jogged around, gathering flowers, as any silly teenage girl would and was happy for that. I was starting to plait the wreath, when the mushrooms growing on the dead tree attracted my short-spanned attention. I wondered briefly if the cavern, luminescent ones were hallucinogenic, gathering the ones at hand, and loosing interest in the subject I quckly as got it.

Soon, I was running around happily, laughing loudly as I trotted down the mountainside and along the road. In about half a hour, I could see clearly the Whiterun walls and in the next twenty minutes I reached the town's stables.

And there came the moment I awaited for so long: I could finally buy my own horse! The dark-brown mare was called Queen Alfsigr, but the man who sold her reffered to her as an Allie. Absolutely cute name.  
>The animal itself was big and bulky, but such a dear shaggy creature, that even a person as inexperienced with horses as me could ride her. It wasn't really the most comfortable way to move, but I couldn't really mind. It wasn't her fault that I was so bad rider, after all.<p>

The things I minded, thought, were guards. They didn't wanted to let me in at first, but all it took was a few words, and they changed their mind, not even knowing if I were telling the truth. But then again, I suppose that in a such small town they could spot me easily if I actually made trouble.

The first place I visited of course wasn't the Jarl's hall, but a weapon shop. My favourite Drunken Huntsman. The shopkeeper, while still a greedy miser, was nice and kind-hearted, and we had a nice chit-chat while I looked around the store. I quickly get rid of the rest of unneeded junk I was still carrying around, and promised to myself that I had to make friends with this man. He was witty and funny, and I'm sure he woudn't mind having me around sometimes. Especially as a customer.

On my way to the Dragonsreach I passed by the hall of Jorrvaskr. I just sighed heavily. I know I could possibly be admitted there as I was, but I felt... unworthy, somehow. They all were a near-legendary warriors, while me... I still was really an pitful excuse for a fighter, no matter how hard I tried, and how much I trained.

I trotted forward, wanting to have all that jarl's business behind me, so I just could go and get to know people a little. If they were anything like the Riverwood's citizens, I'll be happy living here. If not... well, that would be a problem.

The big, wooden gates of the jarl's hall opened for me, and I stepped inside with as much dignity I could master. Sadly, it wasn't much.

* * *

><p>The first person I ecountered in the Dragonsreach was unsuprisingly that warrior dunmer that was Jarl's... something. I never really thought about her function, but she seemed to be somethin like security chief. Maybe guards officer, then?<p>

The intimidating redhead stalked my way, and questioned my presence there. Of course it didn't took much to be taken to the Jarl himself. I wondered briefly what would they do if I was an assasin, but I dismissed the thought. They might not behave the most sane way, but they had to be experienced, after all.

The Jarl himself looked pretty much rugged. Everyone in the hall would be more representative, but I supposed it didn't mattered. He just did his job well, and the people trusted him, that was enough. And he was the man who commanded me in this irritating authorative tone.

"You were in Helgen! Saw the dragon on your own eyes?" he asked.

"Yes, sir." I told him, bowing as courtly as I possibly could "I was also told that it was seen heading that way. Riverwood begs for support."

He looked more agitated that it was good for his health.  
>"Ilireth was right! And what you say now, Proventus? Huh?" he clapped his hand happily "Now, send guards to Riverwood!"<p>

"My lord, the jarl..." the half-bald man started to protest, but the imperious gesture of his master's hand cut him out.

"Not another word, Proventus. I wont let mine people suffer!" I had this feeling they didn't like each other. I wonder why, really.

"I won't forget your help." said the Jarl, turning back to me. "But if you'r willing, I could have one more favor to ask of you."

"I'm at your service, my lord." I told him, bowing my head once again.

"Oh, but first, let's find my court wizard, Farengar. He is an expert in dragons and the gossip." he declared, stepping down from his throne. I followed him to his mage's chambers.

"Farengar, I found you someone. She can take care of that little problem of yours!" Jarl exclaimed with a happy voice. I wondered if he really knew how had it sounded, or was just plainly stupid. Well, he probably didn't care. Being a master allowed you some things... wait. That came out all wrong. I didn't want such pictutres in my head! Damn you, kink-meme, oh damn you!

The clear, soft voice interrupted my feat of inner panic.

"Hmm, I think I can have some use of you." Farengar measured me with his glance. "How do you feel about fething me something?"

"That is, by the 'fetching', I mean going to the ancient ruins and retrieve some long-forgotten item." he corrected himself. Oh, talk to me, man. I could listen to that voice for hours...

I made a point of looking him in the eyes, fighting down the blush.

"I'm alright with it." damn, now he is going to take me for an idiot.

"Straight to the point? Good. I like people who doesn't ask unnecessary questions." Gods, he really took me for a brainless thug. How I hated myself at the moment.

"I... got to know the location of the ancient tablet. It's in the Bleak Falls Barrow depths." he smiled at me ironically. "Simplicity itself."

Ooooh, you want the show of stupidity? So I'll give you a show stupidity, you heartless hypocryte!

"Ahahaha!" I stated eloquently, looking at the ceiling "You mean this old stoney?" I asked innocently, pulling the tablet in question from my pack.

He smiled again, this time for real.  
>"Great job! You really are better that the thugs that Jarl usually sends my way." he said, his cute accent making my grudge melt away. I just couldn't stay angry at him, even if he was an arrogant, selfish bastad.<p>

We talked for a while longer, but the that redheaded bitch Ilireth decided it just the perfect time to run in, ruining my conversation.

"Wizard, they saw the dragon in the area!"

I could see the lights that lighted in his eyes on her words.

"Really! I shoud go to see it!"

"I wouldn't be so excited." the woman stated "We could all be in danger!"

I saw him frown and couldn't keep from smiling. He was just like a child.

"Oh, alright, Ilireth. But I suppose we should go and talk with the Jarl, shouldn't we."

They were gone even before I had time to follow, and I looked arround, disoriended. Where the hell were they?  
>After a bit of quick thinking, I decided to check the upper part of the building, and I wasn't mistaken. Unfortunately I was late for the guard's report, but I already knew what was it about.<p>

The Jarl looked in my direction.

"You! You'll go with them." he pointed his finger at me. "You survived Helgen, so you know more of dragons that any of us."

His expression softened.

"But don't think I forgotten I forgotten about what you did so far. You may be sure that you'll be rewarded accordingly. I already talked with my steward so you'd be able to buy a house there, in the Whiterun."

Yeah, man. So cute. The best thing to say after commanding around somebody owing no loyalty to you.  
>Farengar's pleading voice stopped me once again.<p>

"But I want to go, too." he looked at the Jarl with his best (or so I assumed) puppy eyes. His lord let out a loud sigh, shaking his head.

"No, Farengar. I can't put you both in danger. I need you." Wow. Did I just sensed a threesome? With the attention he put to everything Ilireth was saying... Possible, very possible.

I just had to grin to my thoughts when I heard the wizard's answer.  
>"As you command, my lord," I was able to swear that I could see the tears of dissapointment in his eyes. The man *really* was like a cute, cuddly puppy, wasn't he?<p>

The Jarl of the Whiterun ignored the tone of his voice, and continued to talk, this time to his other favorite.

"It isn't win or death mission. Don't get yourself killed, Ilireth." what did I say you? The apprarently were a pair.

She didn't protested as well, as she turned around and rushed through the hall and outside. I followed her, forcing myself not to hop into the water down there, using the steps instead. I had to be strong! I haven't had any spare clothing after all. If I got myself soaked just now...

By the time we reached the city gates, I was reminded painfully why I was to buy a house. The junk I was still carrying around bounced on my back, making me cringe. Really, man, I could have planned that better.

Passing the gates, I was sure that I heard something weird in the wind. Paranoia, already?

As soon as I get out, I hopped on my horse and set out, Allie accepting my behaviour stoically. Really, she was worth every damn piece of gold that I paid for her.

I passed the redhead by and trotted towards the burning watchtower, paying no attention to the road. Who needs them, petty things, anyway?

I came close to the building in no time, but turned back, and left my dear horse behind the closest trees I could find. I didn't want to see her come to any harm. I returned to the road and was suprised to see Ilireth and the guards running that way. I though that they were faster... but then again, I was the one with the horse, somehow.

We crouched behind the rock.

"There's no dragon, but he sure as hell was!" I heard the dunmer's scream in my ear. Ow, woman! Watch around!  
>She paid me no heed, and continued.<p>

"Look for the traces and survivors!"

I already could say that there will be none, but who cared?

I headed towards the tower to see if there was anything I could take before dragon arrives, even the sound of the banner fluttering on the wind making me shudder. Or wasn't it...?

I heard another cry, this time man's one.  
>"NO! Get back! He's still here somewhere!"<p>

The dunmer commander followed me towards the ruin.

"What happened here? Where is this dragon? Quickly, now!"

"I don't know!" exclaimed the soldier. Well, there WERE survivors, after all.

Just as I passed the tower's entrance, there was another scream.  
>"May Kynareth save us, here he comes again!"<p>

May she, indeed! Man, I'm doomed!

"Here he comes, Find cover, and make every arrow count!" Ilireth called. Now I understood why she was made a commander. I was just a coward, taking cover, while she stood there, giving orders.

I was run away from the place, when the dragon flew by just mere meters in front of me. I turned momentarily, hiding under the half-ruined wall. What I wouldn't do for the game archery skills. That slowing down the time thing would come handy just now.

The wall trembled under the weight of the glorious beast, the falling dust getting in my eyes.  
>Oh great. That's just perfect, to hide under the exact place where the dragon was going to rest.<p>

I sprang back to my feet, running away, and get in the way of fire, breathed by the dragon in that moment. I felt my skin burning and forced myself not to scream, tumbling away from the flame, uncorking the bottle as soon as I got up again. The potion dulled the pain a little, allowing me to clear my head.

I got to the spot away from the rest of archers and pulled out my own bow. The place managed to be wrong, the dark clouds od smoke hiding the dragon from my eyes. Perfect, just perfect. I couldn't be any more devoid of luck in this fight, could I?

I took the arrow and decided to force luck to come to me. One, two, I released one arrow after another, untill the dragon found my eyes with his. The beast raised and started to go my way, but the last, third arrow of mine reached his neck.

He stumbled and fell, unmoving, just as he should have been if Alduin hadn't decided to make appearance.

I approached the massive body, and touched it's skin. It was cold, but started getting warmer. I withdrew my hand just a moments before bits of its skin started to float in the air as a burning paper would, the sight as disturbing as it was beautiful. I backed down, watching as the flame consumed dragon's body, silky threads of smoke reaching me, enveloping my mind and body both in its ghostly embrace.

It felt as if the elements of the puzzle were moving to the right places on their own. The soft whispers of the thousand voices and the one melting down in the one profound sensation, splipping into my soul. I felt rather than saw the pictures of warriors getting crushed by my strong claws, my wings forcing the air to give me the way, my magnificent voice forcing the heroes to back down in fear. All of that and more, filled that empty place that learning the Thu-um left in me, worming itself to the back of my mind and forming in the word that I could not only hear, but feel, taste and understand. Fus - the Strenght, the Force.

I stood there, shocked for a little longer, then started to take in the sight of the beast's bones absent-mindely.  
>There was some burned skin and some scales left at the joins of the monster. Good.<p>

I took out my knife and started to cut it off, gathering all the lesser bones I could reach, finding the armor of the Whiterun guard in the place where the beast's stomach would be a mere moments before. Poor man, he hadn't had so much luck as me today.  
>I could count the arrows I took out from amongst the dragon bones. There was seven of them. Ha, so I had my share in taking the creature down, after all.<p>

I hasn't really paid attention to the guards' chatter until they turned to their dunmer commander for the opinion.

"Ilireth, you're silent?"

"Right, tell us if you believe in these fairy tales!"

"Silence, both of you!" she stated, bitchy as she was. "There we have a death dragon. This means that they can be killed."

"I don't need some... Dragonborn" she added with disdain "but a warrior."

I was really ready to kill that idiot in that very moment. If I wasn't there, they wouldn't be able to kill it! They need the Dragonborn! Can't the understand it after all she have witnessed!

"You're not Nord, you don't understand!" the guard exclaimed, speaking my mind, then turned to face me.

"If you really are a Dragonborn, Shout! They can do this."

I stared at the man. I felt the word, that was true, but to use it...?

"See? You're just a gullible fool. She cannot do it."

Before I could understand what I was doing, I turned at the mocking Nord with bared teeth, and let my anger out.

**_FUS!_**

The guard stumbled and fell on the ground a few feets behind his previous location.

"The Shout! Like the Greybeards!" the one supportive of me called, watching me pant heavily after the power passed through me.

"I saw much more stranger things in my travel" the dunmer woman brushed it off. I felt my anger rising again, but decided to ignore it... for now.

"It was the harder battle I was fighting in, and I saw many." she turned to face me. "I'm happy you were with us today."

She smiled at me. Bitch. NOW you are appreciating me? After you just insulted me so! No way, you're going to pay for that... somehow.

"We'll stay here a little longer. Return to the Jarl straight away and tell him what happened."

Great. Now I'm not only a little, crazy child, but also an errand girl? Thanks you risked your life to help, now get outta here?

I was mad, but I complied with her request... no, her godsdamned _order_, running to the bushes, where my mare was patiently awaiting my return, nibbling on the nearby twigs and grass.

I hugged her by the neck to calm down a little, and after a short while I got into the saddle. In no time I was back in the Whiterun stables, deciding to make the rest of way to the top on my own feet. Allie's safety was more important, after all.

Somewhere in the midde of my road to the town I could feel the air shudder.

_**Doooo vaaah kiiiin~!**_

The voice similiar to the old woman's one called. I smiled to myself. They certainly didn't sound so seriously as they woud like to.

* * *

><p>A the gates I quickly passed the group made od few Redguards and city guards. To tell the truth, I ran past them, not wanting to get involved in the matter I didn't know if was right or wrong.<p>

The first thing I heard after entering the Dragonsreach hall was a sharp intake of breath from a suprised guard, young, judging by his voice.

"The guards are saying that you are the Dragonborn... but that cannot be true, right?"

I looked him in the eyes... well, in the holes in the helmet where his were hidden.

"Man, believe me, I used to think like you, but then..." I had to bit down my lips to stop myself from uttering the arrow-to-the-knee comment. That could be cruel, and untrue, to boot. "...then I saw what I did. And you may believe me, that wasn't exactly the thing I wanted to see."

We looked at each other for the moment, then stepped away, me to state my report to the Jarl, him to return to his guard's duties.

* * *

><p>"So, what happened at the watchtower?" the Jarl demanded to know, after the short quarrel with his steward. "Was the dragon there?"<p>

"It was destroyed, but we managed to kill the dragon." I replied. Well, as close to the truth as it will ever be.

"I knew I could count on Irileth!" the man exclaimed with emotion, but returned to the earth quickly. "Now, but that's not all, is it?"

I felt a little uncomfortable saying this about myself, but well...

"Weeell, they say I might be the Dragonborn from the legends~~." I answered sheepishly.

Nord seemed visibly agitated.

"Dragonborn? What do you know about Dragonborn?" he asked with a frown.

"When we killed the dragon, he passed something on me. Some... power." I was even more uncomfortable saing this, but they had to know the truth.

"Fascinating" the man mused, not looking at me anymore. "So it's you they were calling!"

"What?"

"They Shouted. I'm sure that everyone could hear that. From what I know, when you do that, you're focusing your vital essence into the Shout."

His eyes focused at me once again.

"They were calling you. Something like this doesn't happened for... ages."

Ever heard of going berserk? The man could surely did that with his talk.

"She's strong, my lord, but there is nothing exceptional in her. Nords' nonsense." his first vizier, as I named the steward in my head, protested.

"Watch your words!" some warrior exclaimed "It's our traditions!"

The Jarl ignored both and continued talking. Gods, can nothing stop this man from blabbering!

"When you killed the dragon... it awakened something in you, and they felt it. You'd better go meet with them." His eyes unfocused once more, remembering something. "Aaah, I kind of envy you. To climb the 7,000 steps once again..."

"I made that pilgrimage once, you know. A very peaceful place, this High Hrothgar." he added, and returned to his musings "They never cared about the world down there. I wonder if they'll start now."

"Go away now!" he turned to others, then back to me. "Thank you for you help... Dragonborn."  
>"I declare you the thane of the Whiterun." he exclaimed officially. "Lydia will be your housecarl from now. Ah!" he remembered something, and added privately: "I'll tell the guards. They can't treat you as the rest of this whole ramble now, can they?" he stepped down from his throne. "Now, go away as well. I've got a city to protect."<p>

I trembled. Under the mask of the blabbering old man he was a skilled, cynical politician after all, the thing I forget looking at his show.

I looked around and couldn't see the warrior woman anywhere around, so I went to check on the Farengar at his study. He wasn't there, too, so I headed to the exit.

And there I spotted Lydia, standing by the door. Oh gods, she was just like my horse!

"It's honor to serve you"she introduced herself politely.

I asked her a few questions, to not to sound disinterested, but I mostly ignored what she sad. Up to the moment she said:

"You're in the ranks of our heroes."

I didn't know if to laugh or cry on that. Really, a great hero, a nerdy girl who cannot even hold the sword properly! And isn't a drunkard, too. I'm sure that these maniacs in Sovngarde would greet me with open arms!

"Come on, Lydia." I sighed. "I might need your help."

After finally exiting Dragonsreach, I gave in to my urges after all, with Lydia looking at me as if I was some sort of madwoman, which was probably true. Who normal would jump down the irrationally long steps right to the pool filled with ice-cold water. Well, at least it was quicker way down.

I started my way to the Breezehome when I realized something terrible.

I hadn't bought a house. Moreover, I wasn't able to *afford* one.  
>NOOO! I was going to die!<p>

* * *

><p>Luckily it was night already, so nearly nobody could see their thane standing waist-high in the water, having a short fit of panic. After I finally calmed down, Lydia helped me walk to the Plains District without a word.<p>

In front of the Bannered Mare I had a short talk with Carlotta Valentia, a local beauty. Not like I could see why would men adore her so, because she surely wasn't the most beautiful woman in the Whiterun, but then agan, she had to have that something in her if they did.  
>Long story short, I agreed to convince the local bard and Don Juan to leave her alone.<p>

Stepping inside I was sure that was going to be an easy thing, but after hearing "I can hear only your jealousy speaking" answer from the said bard, I just stared at him for the moment. That has never happened to me in the game!

"Aaah, never mind." I responsed finally, deciding to deal with the man when I wouldn't be so damn worn out. After all, getting in the fight with the man bigger than me couldn't do well for my hero image, could it?

I rented a room and closed the door, only to see the other one behind me open. Fully. An empty frame with nothing to close it, open to the inn.

I cursed foully.

Open door, and that damn bard playing. And playing. And playing. The whole bloody night.

Oh, how I hated him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Really, people. You hurt me. Over four days and only one review? Shame on you.**

**Since now I will probably update 1-2 times a week, or even less frequently. I've got lots of work to catch up with. And I'm re-playing Skrim, making notes, for the sake of this story.**

**Oh, and I'm working on a Vilkie chibi button: I've made a sketch (and lineart, but the second one looks worse). Check it up and tell me what you think! My deviantart account is Kinka-pl.  
>It will take me a lot of time, because I want to end this story first, and I still have no idea what will happen, since I suck at romance. :D <strong>

**Siela77 - What about an empty house that is nearly impossible to find for 12000 septims? That's Jarl Ulfric and Windhelm to you. :D  
>And I suppose that she's gonna worry anyway. She likes emo-ing way too much to stop. D<strong>

**Vilkas news for this chapter: "After the Companions questline has been completed Ria can ocassionally be found roaming Skyrim with Vilkas."  
>Shit. I used to like her, but now... Well, let's just say I'm thinking of making her my temporary companion. And she won't be returning, if you cath my meaning.<strong>

**By the way, it's freezing hell around there. It's about 12-13 Celcius degrees in my house, and I have problems typying, because my fingers are too cold. I'm starting to understand why would other nations hate Skyrim that much. But they have nice cosy fireplaces. Damn them.**

**P.S.: Shit, it seems I cannot concentrate on writing. That sucks. D:**

* * *

><p>On the morning, the bard was still playing. I cursed silently, getting up slowly. I felt as if I had a hangover, being exausted even before I started to do anything. Half-wittingly, I got out of bed and walked lazily to order my breakfast. The inn's owner was suprised to see me, but she hasn't said a word as she went to the backroom to make my food. I was happy to have a bit of coin on me, but I felt bad for wasting it on something that trivial. However, a warm meal was a must here, where the morning chill could kill an unprepared person.<p>

By the time I finished eating, my housecarl followed me to the main room of the inn, still not saying a word if she wasn't asked directly. Gods, she really *was* like my horse. Only I wouldn't leave my things on the animal's care.

Walking out of the Bannered Mare I understood Hulda's weird gaze. It was a hour before dawn, and while not bark anymore, most people had to be still sleeping. I get up earlier because I was used to waking at 6 a.m. for school a mere few weeks before, and after that I was living in the small village, where everyone started their work early on the morning. Here, in this "big city", the people's habits sure had to be different. Damned lazybones.

The other reason for the town looking deserted was an unpleasant, cold rain that was pouring down from the darkened sky. With everything closed, I decided to return to the inn, much to the Lydia's obvious contentment.

Knowing that this was going to be a hard day for me, I persuaded her to tutor me about fighting a little. If I wanted to be let into the Companions, I had to be at my best, no matter how pitful I was. They always let people in in-game, didn't they? But it was different this time. I wanted to win these people's respect, not to be looked down... too much. Lydia took my fighting form witchout questions, and I was grateful for this.

Afted selling some more junk at the Warmaiden's, I decided that my time has come. I wasn't to pay to sleep in that godsdamned inn anymore, and I wasn't sure of myself enough to start adventuring on my own. I needed a firm standing point, and the warrior organisation would give me that, and much more.

I wiped my hands on my thighs nervously, looking at the sky. The rain had stopped, and it looked like it was going to be a fine weather. I could only hope that this was a good omen, but wanting to postpone the inevitable I headed to the Skyforge. I needed to check if the best smith in the Whiterun could offer me some better weapons, but was met with disappointment once again. Because I wasn't the Companion, the only things he could offer me were of the average quality. One more reason to hurry and get this over already.

Seeing me eyeing the Jorrvaskr building nervously, Eorlund spoke up harshly.

"Don't think they could use you, girl." after an awkward moment he shrugged "But stranger things happened."

I looked at him in suprise. I didn't expected him to act this way. He was always... well, a lot nicer. But then again, usually I was already in the band by the time I spoke with him. I wondered briefly if all the people in the city were like this, but nodded nevertheless.

"Thank you for opinion" I responded silently, and feeling his disapproving gaze, I added: "but I knew that already."  
>Nobody respected a obedient coward, didn't they?<p>

He just shot me a glare, and returned to his work, giving me clear sign to leave.

Well, enough of delaying the inevitable. If I was going to do this at all, I could as well do it now.

Despite cold air I could feel my palms sweating. I've been trembling not only because of the weather, and Lydia noticed this.

"My thane?"

I turned around to face her. That was the first time she spoke on her own accord.

"Yes, Lydia?"

"Can I speak freely?" she asked, concern apparent on her pretty face.

"Of course, whenever you want." I replied, suprised. What was I, some scary mighty lord, for a woman to be hesistant to speak to me?

"You are going to ask Companions to allow you to join them, aren't you?" I nodded. That was pretty obvious, considering my behaviour.

"Then with all due respect, get a grip on yourself. Go get a drink, or something." ignoring my shocked expression, she continued "You are the Dragonborn from a legends. Let them see that. Let them know you are their equal, or even better. Because..." she hesitated "...the scared girl I see now is no thane, and not a person worthy to walk the halls of Jorrvaskr."

Well, so much for being like my horse.

"You are right." I sighed "I just can't help this. I feel as if I was not worthy anyway."

"You're not right." she shook her head "I believe I heard that some of them are there since they were children. Were they worthy then?"

I looked at her as if she sprang a second head or something.

"You... you're right. Oh gods, Lydia, I love you!" I hugged the woman. Well, not the most wise thing to do, since she was wearing her usual iron armor, but not like I cared at the moment.

"Just remember to carry your head high." she awkwardy patted me on the back, clearly not used to such displays of emotion... at least not from her superiors. "I'll wait for you just right in front of door."

I was still nervous, but her words made me feel better. I straightened my back and marched straight to the big, wooden building housing the Companions.

* * *

><p>Even with my initial improved self-esteem, faced with the doors I made my best efforts to slip inside unnoticed. Unnecessarily so, as it turned out. Inside there everyone was occupied with a staring brawl.<p>

"And they are at this again." grumbled the gray-haired man, which I recognized as Skjor.

Feeling a little uncertain, I hid behind one of the wooden pillars, separating the outer part of the room from the bigger, table-filled one, silently observing the fight. The warrior-woman could be either Ria or Njada, but I decided that it had to be the second one. Ria looked less intimidating than that. Or so I hoped. The other participant was apparently Athis, not being the one that could be confused with anyone in the Jorrvaskr. I stared a bit at him, then decided that the dark elves were an ugly bunch, indeed.

The fight went on and on, and after some time I grew bored. It was nothing like I excepted my grand entrance to the mead hall would look like, but after I spotted that thought I facepalmed myslef inwardly. That just gave you a great excuse to sneak around unnoticed, lass. You should be grateful for this! And I was... partly. Another part of me just felt forgotten and unimportant. Silly part!

I shook my head to clean my mind of the useless thoughts. That didn,'t help, of course, but I felt a little better. As silently as I could manage, I started to go towards the living quarters, when I caught the eye of a scantily clad woman. The way she dressed alone was a clear indication of her identity, but the look she shot me made it certain - Aela the Huntress knew I was there, and questioned my presence.

Not really knowing what to do, I nodded my head in greetings. She continued to look at me for the moment, then returned to watching the fight. I breathed a sigh of relief and completed rest of the way quickly, thanking the gods for their assistance. After entering the basement I was met with the sight of the completely deserted stony halls. Only then I realized how small their number really was. Sure they will take me in. All of the real warriors were with Stormkloaks these days. Or Imperials, I corrected myself.

I was ready to step in to the Kodlak's living room - as I called the place myself - when I caught up the sight of Vilkas. The man was sitting with his face in his hands. I hid behind the doorframe quickly, not wanting to intrude. After all, with a man like this, a moment of weakness was probably something to be ashamed of.

"But I still feel a call of the blood!" He complaned to the other man.

I listened to the conversation, not really hearing words - I know what they talked about anyway - but absorbing his voice. The way it was composed, yet with a whiny undertone. He might respect his Harbinger, but he was sure not a humble about this. He was his equal, even if was not. Was that what Lydia tried to tell to me all along?

Upon hearing the long silence after the Kodlak's "Leave that to me" I knew that was the time to make my appearance. Even if they didn't already know I was there, they were going to know in mere moments, and I didn't want to appear like the Silver Hand's spy. Or like a thief, anyway. I was pretty sure they hated thieves.

"A stranger comes to our home." the older man... warned the other? His voice was rather neutral, but the look he gave Vilkas certainly looked like one.

I gathered all my courage and didn't allowed myself to look down under the youger warrior's scrutinizing glare.

"I want to join the Companions."

Kodlak raised a brow and looked at me more attentively than before.

"Would you now? Let me have a look at you." He said, beckoning me closer. When I stepped towards him, he took a while to examine me, then added thoughtfully: "Yes, perhaps."

He straightened in his chair.  
>"You've got a certain strenght of spirit."<p>

I stared at him in suprise. Me and strenght of spirit? Maybe stubbornness, but strenght? No way, old man!

"Maaaster." I looked at the dark-haired man from the corner of my eye. That lazy scornfull tone caught me off guard. He adressed his elders like this! "You're not truly considering of taking her." he continued, entirely ignoring my presence. That man really was an ass. But it's not like I didn't agree with him.

"I'm nobody's master, Vilkas" Harbinger said and this moment I knew I was in. Just to prove a point.

I ignored rest of their bickering and was just waiting anxiously for the end of it... or I thought I was.

"What matters is what is in their heart." Kodlak's attracted my lost attention once again, gesturing towards me.

"And their arm." the younger Companion added sarcastically.

"Of course." Whitemane nodded patiently "How do you manage in fight, girl?"

Now that was a hard question. Not like I could lie to them, but telling the truth was no option as well. Wait, what that game option went...?

"I still have lot to learn." I could feel myself blush. That were the correct words, but they were not mine, and I was sure they could sense it.

Even if they both did, it was Vilkas who sent me another suspicious glare. His elder just continued being nice.  
>"That's the spirit!" he laughed "Vilkas is the one to get started at that."<p>

It was just me, or was there rivalry in the air?

"Vilkas" the man continued, more seriously this time. "take her to the training grounds and test her."  
>I could feel my legs shaking for a moment. Keep your cool, girlie! Remember what Lydia said? You're the thane of this city, it's you getting the party started on the saturday... wait. That came out all wrong, didn't it?<p>

I did my best to look unaffected, but I could feel somehow that the younger man was not being fooled. I could feel his eyes boring into my back as I was walking a few steps before him, putting a little more sway to my hips than usuall. When I noticed I was doing that, I trotted a few feets forward before returning to trying to behave normally. I didn't wanted to be seen as an weak, coward... tavern wench.

He passed me by easily, while I was occupied with fighting my body's reaction to the stressing situation. I felt relieved instantly, slowing down my steps. That wasn't the most courageous thing to do, but then again... remember what was the guards' reaction to killing a chicken? So they wouldn't kill me, right? Not in the public, anyways.  
>I had to smile to myself on that thought, picturing me as an giant bird, running away from chibi Vilkas.<p>

Upon reaching the training grounds my short-lived mirth gave way to nervousness again. Well, not to fear, thanks the gods, but I had only my studded Imperial armor and a poor knife against full plate armor and one of the better swords aroun there, and that's when we aren't counting skill in.

From a corner of my eye I could see a group of Companions gathering, keen on having a little fun, but my most of my attention was directed on a man, who seemed to take his annoyance out on the training dummies.  
>Then a realisation hit me. He didn't want to hurt me. Or anyone, on that matter. He just didn't want some whelp involved in the dangerous affairs of the organisation and getting in the way, at the moment. Or at all.<p>

I just had to smile again, looking at the warrior. A good man, then.

And that was just the moment he turned around.

"The old man said to have a look on you." he stated bitterly with a glare "So lets do this."

"Just have a few swings at me" the man explained "so I can see your form. Don't worry" he smirked at me "I can take it."

Now, that was an open insult, and I didn't like it a little bit. I got in a fighting stance as Ralof taught me, back in Riverwood. And I would just stand like this until the night if not for his war cry.

"Never should have come here." He snarled, taking a wide swing of his sword at me.

I barely managed to pull back, trying not to loose my footing. Even the books always said that the footing was the most important...

The second swing was even closer to hitting me, and it forced me to start moving finally. I circled the man, trying to find some opening, and seeing one at his left side just below his shield, I send a strong (at last for me) thrust of my dagger that way. With my short range that turned out to be a serious mistake. He was expecting my move, and pushed me away forcefully with his shield-arm, cold metal bitting into my flesh.

"You have a very sure arm." he commented neutrally, waiting for me to regain my balance, then smashed me with a flat of his sword, once, twice. I nearly fell again, but managed to swirl away just in time to weaken the impact of the second blow. I could barely hear amused woman's voice, saing "Maybe she'll live."

I was already angered, my fear from before already disappeared a while ago in a bust of adrenaline, but hearing his next words made me lose control of myself.

"Oh, come on. You're not able to hurt me." seeing the mocking look in his eyes, I made a move that could cost me my life in a real fight. I just hit him on the shield with all the strenght I could master. The little miracle happened, making it angled in just the right way for my dagger to slip on it's slippery surface. My clenched fist contacted with his face painfully, but not like I cared about this at the moment.

I jumped away, slightly shocked, but knowing that it was my grand chance, and didn't need Aela's approving comment to realise that.

I started circling him again, more self-confidently this time. I was hunting now, I realized, and was trying to find the weakest point of my stronger prey. I smirked. I could get used to feeling like that.

He made another opening, but this time I recognised it as fake. No skilled swordsman would commit the same mistake twice in a row. I made a quick move to the right instead, knowing he can't comfortably reach me with his sword this way. Before he could turn to me again, I hit him in his unprotected upper arm, and sprang back again to avoid getting in the way with his arm.

He suprised me with sheating his sword and granting me with a half-smile.

"Not bad." he decided, but then his expression turned to distaste once again.

"You might *just* made it, but you're still a whelp to us, so you do what we tell you." he made a show of unsheating his weapon once again "There's my sword. Take it to Eorlund to have it sharpened, and be careful." he gave me a bad look again "it's probably worth more than you are."

Don't thing of any polishing-the-sword innuendos, you stupid girl. Don't think...

I had to cover my laughter with a cough nevertheless, earning an suspicious glare form him. Gods, the man frowned too much for his own good, didn't he? I had a sudden urge to tell him he'll stay this way, but just looked brightly up in his eyes, and half-trotted, half-danced away with his sword in relief-induced happines.

* * *

><p><em>Vilkas just stared at her in disbelief.<em>

_That girl was mad. Certainly. _


	10. Chapter 10

**Gods, sure as Hell I took my sweet time, didn't I?**  
><strong>That little, shitty written chap was lying around for MONTHS now, but did I take TWO hours I needed to get it more or less ready to be released? Sure as Hell I didn't! Sorry, people, I'm probably mad at myself more than you, since I actually care.<strong>

**With having as much time, you'd think that the writing quality should be good? No way, not with me. It's even worse than usual, and the chapter is stiff. Really, I'm wondering why I actually written that.**  
><strong>And Google Translator is being a b***tch. I don't really understand meaning of the words I write, half of the time.<strong>  
><strong>And don't even get started with the grammar. This one can suffer with some Slav grammar issuses.<strong>

**So, I'll be really, really, really grateful towards everyone who points out both typos and grammar mistakes to me. I really should find myself a beta-reader.**

**But don't think I have done *nothing* at all. I have the random notes and minor real-life ideas list longer that this chapter by now, haha.**

**Allright, after that silly rant, there comes time to adress some comments:**

**About self-insert being Mary-suish: **I know what you mean. It's hard to keep character that is basically yourself from getting Mary-suish in the setting that requires a noob to gain such a powers in a very short time. Well, it's *too* easy to go Mary-sue even when you are just *talking* talking about yourself in real-life. And, to tell the truth, that comment hurt me so much because this is the thing I fear the most (next to a real bad quality writing).  
>But sure, when I did a Mary-sue test, Elle scored over 150, 50 meaning Mary-Sue. I started to be real worried then. So, if you ever see mary-suism in my fics, cry aloud, by all means, and I'll try to corect that, if it'll be possible, since, while it doesn't bother me much in other people's work, it would be nice to do learn to do something well, wouldn't it?<p>

**About "surviving an icical to the face":** that is actually possible. Both ice and fire damage are actually survivable in real-life, they just tend to be crippling. And with magic at work, it's not such a big deal, I suppose that would just hurt as hell. And there was that case in Poland, lately, when some general or somesuch *shoot* himself in the head. The bullet went through his cheek, so he ended well and healthy, so I kent this in my mind.  
>But worry not, being a whinning baby she is, she won't miss a bit of pain in her constant whinning...<p>

**About the ancient sword:** Nah, I never did. For me it's always been a big, heavy, useless thing, since I use daggers, haha.

**"As for how you SI killed that durgar lord, at least you used a reasonable explanation insted of the usual surge of power most si get." -** well, but isn't a sudden courage/berserk fit essentially the surge of power you talk about? Now you mention it, I wish I never included it, but I tend to follow too close to the game, with just mentioning that my chara's making things I shouldn't be able to do (and whining about it).

**About putting my things on the horse:** I probably just forgot to do so. And I'd be scared it'll run away. Or someone steals it. Or it could get eaten. Or somesuch. Probably I just didn't think about it in that moment. Silly me.

**About ice sword: **Would you be able to use something like this in the real life? This big and heavy? Just asking.  
>I'd prefer to learn to use lighter weapons first, myself.<p>

**About marrying Marcurio: **I know about him, even if I haven't used him, since I love running around with Vilkie. But if we're talking about mean remarks... I was said that when you force Ralof to marry you via console commands, he keeps asking you if you always been this ugly, so... xD

**Ahh, smell of the Author's-Note-that's-almost-longer-than-a-chapter-itself in the morning!**

**Bethesda owns everything, anyway. It's a big company, so it's nothing wrong with it's owning a world. Or two.**

** And thanks to *you*, people. If not you and your (mostly) nice reviews, I'd already drop the thing (and hate myself even more). So know, that even a little comment is highly appreciated, and I go all 'Awww"-ing over it in the weird places.**

**And the next chapter should take less time to write, since it'll be basically short training and talking with people thingie, but you shouldn't expext before half of June, anyway. Things are going to be real scary at school now.**

* * *

><p>When I returned from another chat in the Skyforge I was still in great mood, and I crossed the threshold of the Jorrvaskr building with a smile plastered on my face. It proved to be wrong expression, apparently, because I was immediately met with Vilkas' annoyed glare. Oh. That man kinda didn't like me, did he?<p>

I hurried to the living quarters, hoping that Aela will be there. I strived to remember which room belonged to whom. The last one was the Harbinger's chamber, but the others? I sneaked as silently as I possibly could and pressed my ear to the door carefully. Hmm, this one was silent, and there was only snoring in the other. That had to be the brothers' bedrooms. Somehow relieved that Vilkas wasn't around, I passed the main corridor again, and I could be sure I was in the right place at once, judging by the woman's voice coming from behind the closed door. Well, I suppose that it's pretty much my bad luck to always check the right patch at the end.

Not wanting to hear something I wouldn't want to know, I quickly knocked, hoping that I wasn't interrupting anything awkward. I knew that Aela would kill me with a dull knife if it was so. Or even worse, find it amusing.

Luckily that wasn't the matter. Both she and Skjor stood in the middle of the room, but their talk died down when I stepped inside. The older man shoot me another glare. Why every man here seemed to hate me so?

I smiled awkwardly, reaching out to give Aela her shield. For some reason I didn't want to come too close. Maybe I just could feel that they were dangerous. Too dangerous.  
>Or I just felt uncomfrotable around her. Probably the latter.<p>

To my suprise the woman returned my smile, flashing her teeth in the wide grin.  
>"Ah, good! I've been waiting for it." she nodded her head in thanks, and raised an eyebrow, intrigued when I continued to stand there. "Are you new here?"<p>

I already opened my lips to answer her, but the still frowning man was faster.

"I told you." he gazed at me angrily "That's the whelp that Vilkas mentioned."

The Huntress smile grew even wider.  
>"Ha, yes! I heard that you gave him quite a trashing!"<p>

I felt myself blush. That... that couldn't be true, right? Well, he was a warrior, and me...  
>I knew I had that startled expression on my face, but I just didn't care. The realization that I was just learning, but I was beggining to be a warrior, too, has hit me hard. When did that began? When I first set out for adventure in the Black Fells Barrow, or... no, the dragon-killing wasn't that epic. In the Barrow I already was able to fight, even if barely so, but...<br>And then the other realization came. The Word. It has changed me a little. I wasn't so afraid to fight anymore. Not to tear somebody's flesh with a knife in combat, anyway. Man, I was really begginig to be a meanie, wasn't I?

"...whelp?"

Sharp voice brought me back from my thoughts. They looked at me expectingly. I missed something again, right?

"She asked you if you thought you could beat Vilkas in a real fight" Skjor repeated, and added with a grimace "But I think not."

"Uh, what?" I was sure I looked dumb now. I did want to tell them 'no I couldn't', but that would be plain awkward. The were Nord warriors, after all, weren't they? Now what was that funny game line...?  
>"Ah, I am... not interested in... bragging contest."<p>

I was sure I was red as tomato while uttering that obvious lie. You're weak and pitful, girl. Why don't you face it?

Aela's response was actually out of place, while she continued to compliment me, annoying Skjor more and more. Wait, annoying him? Now that was clear. Why does everyone use me as an godsdamned power struggle pawn? In Companions, of all places?

I was still pondering over my oh-so-cruel fate, when the old man decided it a fine time to scream.

"Farkas!" Then looked at me harshly. "I'm sure you are going to get along with that ice-brain."

I just stared at him. Why, oh why couldn't anyone respect my eardrums? First that Dunmer hag and now him.

* * *

><p>Farkas was suprisingly... well, I think I'd call this grim-bear-cheerful - leading me to the my new resting place. And awkward, too. I had to hold back a chuckle at his attempts at small talk, but I had to admit it - it was nice to be actually welcomed.<p>

"Nice to have a new face around" he once again tried to start conversation. "It gets boring here sometimes."

I was sure that I was grinning like an idiot at that. Boring? You don't know what you're asking for! But then again, these drunkards could be probably more entertaining than me at any given time, considering what stories I heard at school. I just wondered what they had there instead of phoning their girlfriends using the sink. Nah, I don't think I really wanted to know.

"I hope we keep you" Farkas kept talking. "It's a hard life."

Wha...? Damn, he was right. Never mind being a warrior, I wasn't one anyway, but sleeping in one room with Njada? Or Torvar? Oh gods. I was going to die.  
>But nice of you, Farkie, talking about me as if I were a puppy or somesuch, anyway.<p>

This was the moment that the stupid corridor decided to end, forcing me to actually look the big man in the face. He wasn't much higher than me, really, but there was... much of him. I was never one for muscles, so he looked plain intimidating to me. I had to remind myself that he wouldn't hurt me, but I trembled nevertheless.

He seemed to ingnore that, and just continued to speak, but I was sure that he tensed even more.

"Here, the quarters are up here" he stated, stainding in the doorframe. "Just pick a bed and fall on it whenever you need." he added, but made no move to let me pass. After a short while, he realized what he was doing, so he moved away, and added awkwardly:

"Looks like the others would like to meet you."

Yeah, sure. They are dying to welcome me, The Miss Unworthy Whelp. Especially Njada.

I wasn't realy willing to step inside, so I just stood there and looked at him... and just let him continue talking. After some more words that I almost knew by heart, he made my status oficially known.

"Good luck. Welcome at the Companions."

I could hear an angry woman's cry from the room in front of me. Thanks, man, she would have killed me if I had to tell her myself.

He was already walking away when he stopped rapidly as if he remembered something.

"By the way, if you're looking for job..." and he gave me details of the "mission", not getting discouraged at all by my lack of verbal response. To tell the truth, all the time he talked, I just smiled and nodded, wishing to have that already behind me. That was a long day, after all, and I really missed the "skip" button.

Until he decided to warn me.

"I don't want to hear about the killing, understand?" he looked at me seriously. "Try not to get carried away."

I stared at him in utter surprise. Man, are we serious or what? I barely kept myself from laughing aloud, fighting to keep my face straight, but Njada wasn't so subtle.

"As if she could!" her sharp voice came from the room.

My thoughts exactly, she-man.

Farkas just shrugged and walked away, giving me one last smile as he saw my grin.

* * *

><p>As I was returning from my task, I could barely contain my laughter. A bit histerical one, I hated to admit. It's not like I had a problem with dealing with the barmaid. Quite the opposite, actually, and that was making it almost unbearable at the moment. Well, this and how late the hour was - well after midnight, I was sure, because I could feel it in my aching muscles.<br>Ah, the irony! Me, pampered youngest daughter, managed to beat up some big bad bandits, the warrior and the true, Nord woman, who was possibly no stranger to barfights. And actually I *was* let into Companions.

I was smirking to myself as I passed the door leading to the hall of Jorrvaskr. It was surely going to be interesting time.

* * *

><p>"I figured you had it in you!" Farkas patted my back friendly. Actually, so friendly that I nearly fell down. "Nicely done!"<p>

He smiled to me, a heartfelt smile that lighted up his eyes, and all I could do was to stare, noting absent-mindely that it was happening to me disturbingly often lately.

I never had a dog, much less a puppy, but that was how I would imagine happy one acting. Even with his intimidating face, I actually thought how cute and sweet he appeared.  
>I answered his smile with my own once again, and headed towards the table. He looked at me for a moment longer, then added:<p>

"Allright, then." and with that, he was gone.

I kept smiling while putting some meat and fried leek on my plate. Meeting with Farkie's good ol' heart, so to speak, brightened my mood, that much was sure. But just then, as I was starting to relax with a good food and a mug of a nice mead in my hand, somebody else decided to drag his pesky hide from his midnight trip. I looked towards the opening door and froze with a piece of a salmon halfway to my mouth.

Vilkas swept the room with an indifferent gaze, not giving me even a nod, so I decided I won't bother, as well. That proved to be quite hard, however, since I was feeling more and more awkward with every passing moment , each one of us not ackownledging the presence of another. I always hated silence, and this man was clearly grating on my nerves with everything he did. Had... to break... the silence...!

"Good evening, Vilkas!"I said, sitting on the opposite end of the bench he occupied. I actually thought about taking another one, even farther away from him, but I decided it would be outright rude. I soon regretted that, however, as I could feel his intimidating aura almost instantly when he looked at me from above. And from a definitely too close distance, if I may say so.

"It's night." he replied, returning to munching on his bread absentmindely, and continuing to ignore me entirely. I was just getting ready to walk away, already, when he looked at me again, much warmer this time. Or, should I rather say, not so freezing cold anymore.

"Come to me with questions, if you need" he told me, after a little more time, and returned to watching spot on the opposite wall wistfully. "I know our history almost as well as Vignar now."  
>His laughter sounded a bit awkward.<br>"Except, I actually remember it."  
>We sat there for a long moment, both looking in the distance, so to speak, before he spoke again.<p>

"It was a pure luck, you know?" he glanced at me from the corner of his eye, still not facing me.

"What?" I asked, even if I was more or less certain I already knew what he was talking about.

"You so much as touching me with that..." he frowned and finished with emphasis "...knife of yours."

I allowed one more moment of silence to pass between us, then nodded my head.

"...I know."

"I just let my guard down because you are such a whelp." he added, seemingly ignoring my answer. Being such a devil's advocate as I was - or just an annoying chatterbox - I had to argue with that.

"That's why you should never underestimate your opponent." I forced a crooked smile to appear on my face "Mightier men than you had already been brought down because of such mistake."

His lips spread into a weird half-smug, half- bitter smirk when he finally turned to look at me with that... probably ironic expression?

"Oh? The pup has sharp teeth, after all."

"Doesn't they all?" I risked a short glare at him, which only seemed to amuse him further. Not knowing what more to do, I just stood up.

"Excuse me, this was a long day." I nodded my head and turned my back to him.

"Don't mind me, little princess. I won't interfere with your beauty sleep." he answered behind me with a smirk clear in his voice.

I tried to ignore his comment and just walked away with dignity, leaving him alone. Or so I wanted to do.  
>About halfway to the stairs, though, I stopped and looked back. He was just sitting down near the middle of the table, at the place next to the one I have left moments ago, before our little... chat. As if he couldn't do it while I was sitting there and eating. Bastard.<br>As if sensing my gaze, he turned his face in my direction, and shoot me one of his own.

I felt as if I was being caught red-handed. I rushed down the stairs in no time, my face burning red.  
>Why did I got that impression that our relationship was going to resemble the one *I* had with my mother? That is, getting along pretty well, when not screaming at one another, but sill trying to avoid the each other as much as possible.<br>Well, maybe without that "getting along" part. Or the "screaming" one, who knows?  
>I forced myself to stop thinking about it.<p>

When I got to the recruits' quarter, I decided that my previous luck continued. Both men, Athis and Torvar, and Njada were already fast asleep, thank the all gods above and under, so I wouldn't have to put up with the barbaric woman's comments for at least some more hours.  
>I had already said my 'good night' to Ria, and was re-plaiting my hair for bed, when I heard some footsteps ringing in the stone hall, and a sound of something hard rolling on the floor. I waited a moment, then looked out to the corridor. I could see Vilkas' back in the distant end of the hallway and the vase lying on the ground near the wall.<br>Wow, the man sure was annoyed. Was it because of me? I surely didn't want to get on his bad side. He might have been full of himself, annoying bastard, but I was sure he could be a great friend... if he tried. And he didn't look so angry just mere moments ago, anyway...

Then another stray thought hit me. Maybe it was his wolfish blood, making him restless? I sure could be touchy when I was tired. He, being both a warrior and a wolf, could be more sleepless that me at my worst exams times. Poor Vilkas...  
>Nah, I wasn't going to pity that man. He sure got what he deserved somehow, I was pretty much certain of this.<br>Wasn't I?


End file.
